The thick mahogany desk was covered with a thick sheet of plastic. It was as if the doctor wanted to protect the surface of this desk – probably a reproduction, definitely not an antique. The plastic had little white plastic snaps that attached to each corner, like a Tupperware container. I stared at the […]Read more "We Pick Our Battles"
“So what does it feel like?” Nick asks me this from behind his computer. He’s wincing, I suppose in solidarity, but it feels more like pity. “It’s like when you sprain your ankle, or jam your finger,” I say, sighing, knowing that there is really no good way to explain it to him. “Like […]Read more "In Between Hope"
We had a crazy week last week. On Monday, Nick went to NYC for the day for work, and was overcome by a strange dizzy feeling. Walls spinning; hard to concentrate; nauseous. He thought maybe he was dehydrated. He drank a lot of fluids. He made it back to Boston that evening — barely — and […]Read more "The Sweetest Pitbull"
It was the end of a very long day when I listened to my voice mail. “It’s important, call me back.” One of the more talkative people I know, my friend wasn’t usually cryptic. I called back immediately. She didn’t say hello, only, “So there is a lump….” My heart sank, because that’s a phrase […]Read more "But I’m So Healthy, How Could I Be Sick?"
My mother is deep in her bed with her socks on, sticking out. She never wore socks, so I remember it surprised me. Her heels were always cracked, like mine are now, and though she perpetually tried to soften them, with creams and socks and special razors, in the summer they immediately toughened up, calloused […]Read more "In the Jungle"
“You look great,” Nick said to me, smiling his crinkly smile and touching my arm. He was a liar, but he was a sweet liar. I looked at myself in the mirror behind the bar. My eyes were rimmed with a yellowish tint. My skin was flaky and beet red from the sun because […]Read more "We Are Still Here"
In fifth grade I started stealing my friend’s underwear. My mother bought me my own, of course, plain white and black and sometimes pink jockeys with a very occasional bikini cut. I hated these underwear. They sagged in the back, making any skirt look like it covered a wet diaper, and poked out of the […]Read more "The Underwear Thief"
When I was pregnant with my second, I had an eighteen month old son. I loved him with every ounce of my being, of course, and I loved that he was a boy. No real reason, except I didn’t know much about boys before him, and there was something about the discovery that was fascinating and fulfilling. But in […]Read more "OK. I Wanted a Girl"
Today was my grandfather’s unveiling. Basically, what that means is after a year of mourning, the Jewish people believe it is time to unveil the headstone in the cemetery. It was an unbelievably beautiful day, and my 93 year old grandmother had no trouble navigating the grass (which is sometimes very wet and muddy) […]Read more "One Day"
Every mother, every father, every person, judges everyone else. That’s just the way we do. I don’t think that’s necessarily bad. We live in a competitive society and being successful does actually mean that sometimes we see each ourselves in a pretty damn fantastic light and others in a dimmer one. So am I being […]Read more "Home School"