“I got my third rejection letter,” my friend says to me mournfully. “This process is ridiculous.” He wants to wrap a typewritten copy of his manuscript in old newspaper, send it to Random House, and become the next Hemingway. He has told me this. “My story is just not relevant anymore.” He sighs. “Who […]Read more "You Are Not Your Rejections"
THERE’S A HEN COME TO ROOST! Miss Madame to the rescue–toute de suite. Dear Miss Madame, After years of working my way through the ranks, I’ve been appointed coach of a men’s Ligue 2 French football team. In France, I am the first woman, ever, to coach in the men’s professional league. There’s […]Read more "Dear Miss Madame : Exile in Roosterville"
Two weeks ago, I wandered from the orchids, palms and shark reefs of Las Vegas’s Mandalay Bay into the Luxor pyramid. In the center of the neon tomb, across from the Margarita by the Yard kiosk, were neighboring exhibits: Bodies and Titanic. Did anyone pause to consider whether stuffing a freak show of skinned, disemboweled, […]Read more "Some Shit from the Gift Shop"
Every mother, every father, every person, judges everyone else. That’s just the way we do. I don’t think that’s necessarily bad. We live in a competitive society and being successful does actually mean that sometimes we see each ourselves in a pretty damn fantastic light and others in a dimmer one. So am I being […]Read more "Home School"
His poems aren’t polished, they say. She starts each reading by reciting her resume. It bores us all. Why does she keep coming around? He’s old. His poetry doesn’t wear well on the page. All her poems are about the same. Who else in this city numbers every poet’s flaws as if all people aren’t […]Read more "After the Reading, they Search for the Perfect Poet"
This Monday we welcomed our member Jessica Vealitzek to Portland’s feminist bookstore In Other Words to read from her newly published novel The Rooms Are Filled. Other local members of the PDXX Collective were her opening acts. It was an auspicious day: the day the Oregon ban on same-sex marriage was struck down. Andrea Janda […]Read more "Photos from the PDXX Collective Reading with Jessica Vealitzek"
Since October I have worked approximately, nine miles from my house and being without a driver’s license ordinarily hasn’t been a major stumbling block for me. However, somewhere between 2004 and now it feels like Trimet’s service has taken such a nosedive, that it seriously impacts my daily life trying to get from point A […]Read more "The Things I Won’t Miss On Trimet"
I often think back to one particular assignment in Ms. Jenewein’s Expository Writing class my senior year of high school. We had to interview someone and write an article. I chose to interview a friend’s father because, starting with almost nothing, he had worked hard to become quite successful. I asked him questions, typed up the […]Read more "In Writing, Tell the Truth"
News of the collapse of the West Antarctic ice sheet dotted my Facebook feed, interspersed with cat memes and the “What Is Your Goddess Name” quiz. It was kind of like going to the Hallmark store and finding an apocalyptic pamphlet tucked in with the birthday cards. It’s your birthday. Fart all you want. The […]Read more "#1 Thing I Can Do To Save the Earth"
I’m filling my Earl Grey tea cup this morning at work when the weirdest water cooler conversation bubbles up. “Let me ask you a strange question.” I smile nervously, “OK.” “You ever close your eyes and press your fingers into your eyelids?” “Yeah, fireworks light show.” “Exactly!” He flutters his eyes closed and lightly demonstrates […]Read more "On Floaters and Flashes"